by nevzter » Tue Jun 12, 2012 4:21 pm
This is from poster Sarasota on Soccer By Ives = may be good for a chuckle.
Breaking News: Look Alike Arrested for Abducting and Impersonating Jurgen Klinsmann.
AP: INTERPOL security officials announced today they had uncovered a plot to kidnap and replace USMNT coach Jurgen Klinsmann with an imposter.
The lead investigator in the case, Sgt. Hans Schultz, said his agency began having suspicions of “foul play” when the goal scoring legend began fielding three defensive midfielders, only one of whom has skill and purpose on the ball. Klinsmann had promised to bring a more possession and attack oriented style of play when named head coach.
Said Shultz, “We noticed the team has looked very un-Klinsmann like lately. “The three defensive midfielders’ inability to possess, pass and create quality chances has stifled the US attack. “As a midfield threesome, they have been clumsy and awkward in their interplay and have given the ball away more than they have generated chances. “Another significant clue that helped us break the case was the imposter’s use of a lone forward who has been frequently stranded on an island. “We knew the real Klinsmann would be more aggressive and use two well-matched forwards to play off of one another in front of goal.”
The Klinsmann look alike, identified by INTERPOL as Jay Göppingen of California, was said to be cooperating with authorities regarding the whereabouts of the real Jurgen Klinsmann. Interpol spokesperson, Gertrude Oberholtzer, said Klinsmann was believed to be safe and would hopefully be located and returned to the team in time for their next qualifying game in Guatemala. Ms. Oberholtzer declined to comment on rampant speculation that the Mexican Futbol Federation was involved in the kidnapping and subsequent charade by the double
"Dreams unfulfilled, graduate unskilled, it beats pickin' cotton and waitin' to be forgotten..." - 'mats